How come I get to live the life I do?

Sometimes I wake up thinking: “How is this my life?”
Not in disbelief, but in deep, heartfelt gratitude.
I get to choose what I do each day.
I’m surrounded by people who nourish me.
I built a business that reflects my values.
I feel free, joyful, and grounded. Not all the time, but often.
And when I don’t, I know how to come back to myself.

But this life didn’t happen by accident.

It’s not just luck.
It’s not just privilege. Though I won’t deny that I’ve had a lot of that, too.
It’s a series of conscious, often difficult decisions.
It’s a path I carved step by step, by listening inwards and choosing courage over and over again.

What shaped my life most were the things I said “no” to.

No to a relationship that was no longer workable, even when it meant going through a painful divorce.
No to a stable job, even when it meant financial insecurity for a while.

And every “no” was also a “yes.”

Yes to self-responsibility.
Yes to healing.
Yes to joy, intuition, freedom, and meaning.

I’ve always felt a quiet rebellion inside me.

The kind that whispers:
“There is another way.”
I never fit into rigid systems.
Not in school. Not in the traditional career path.
I always wanted to understand why things are the way they are and what it would take to change them.

I built my life around freedom.
Not just the freedom to travel or work from anywhere. Though I did that for some years.
But the inner freedom to make my own choices.
To follow my own pace.
To say yes when something feels right.
To say no when it doesn’t.

That kind of freedom is a mindset.
It has a lot to do with how much we trust ourselves.
With how independent we are from the expectations of others.

My roots are part of what gave me wings.

My parents never pushed me to follow a certain path.
They let me find my own way and they believed in me before I believed in myself.
When I told them I wanted to travel after my master’s, they didn’t try to talk me out of it.
They supported me emotionally.

Their example of a loving and stable relationship taught me so much.
They read books together, went to couple’s seminars, worked on themselves.
They put their relationship before us kids and that made us feel even more secure.

But it wasn’t all easy.

I’ve known burnout.
Depression.
Suffered from an auto-immune disease.
Had gut and skin issues.
And the pain of unlearning beliefs like:

• “I’m only worthy when I’m productive.”
• “I can’t rest until everything is done.”
• “I am shy and don’t like public speaking.”

I learned to listen to my body.
To treat discomfort not as something to avoid, but as an invitation to grow.

I started over.
After my travels. After my divorce.
I rebuilt community and when I couldn’t find it, I created it.

I believe we always have some choices, but not everyone has the same options.

I’ve met people during my travels whose lives were shaped by war, economic crisis, or systems of injustice.
People whose opportunities were so different from mine.
It made me humble.
It made me aware of my privilege. Growing up in a peaceful country like Switzerland, with a loving family and stable home.

But I believe this:
We don’t always choose what happens to us. But we can choose what we do with it.
We can choose the beliefs we feed.
We can choose to take self-responsibility.
We can choose to ask for help, take a break, begin again.

My life today is the result of thousands of micro-decisions.

Choosing to go on a trip even when there were lingering doubts.
Choosing to invest in myself, even when it felt uncomfortable financially.
Choosing to rest when the voice in my mind says I could do more.
Choosing to start a women’s circle when I felt hurt.
Choosing to let others in.
Choosing to believe that healing is possible.
Choosing to take action, even though I might make mistakes.
Because I believe mistakes are learning opportunities.

That joy is worth prioritising.
That my intuition knows the way.

I don’t take this life for granted.

I don’t say that lightly.
I’m deeply grateful. Every single day.
Gratitude has become a habit. Like brushing my teeth or drinking water.
It grounds me. It reminds me of what matters.

So if you’re reading this and you’re in a place of uncertainty.
If you’re in the middle of unlearning old beliefs.
If you’re building a life that looks different from the one others expected of you.

I want you to know, it’s worth it.

Every boundary you set.
Every tear you cried.
Every bold, unconventional choice.

It’s shaping a life that’s yours.

And if I can live this life, maybe you can too.

🔍 Personal Reflection Prompts